Matthews Family Herald

Last year seemed to be the year of broken marriages. We've seen at least 5 different marriages of people we know break apart upon the rocks and sink this year.

My daughter was just married this year and she wrote out some vows which I wanted to share. I posted them originally on Facebook and so I've copied and pasted them here. They are in reverse order:

‎12. I vow to never leave you and will love you until my final breath. Amen.

‎11. I will always remain loyal to you, and will not allow anyone to take your place, physically or emotionally.
‎10. I will support and encourage you through all that life will bring, sharing in your joy as well as your pain.
‎9. I will never become complacent, but will always strive for growth in myself and our marriage.


‎8. I vow to never leave an issue unresolved and will not allow un-forgiveness or bitterness to remain indefinitely in my heart.

‎7. In such conflicts, I will communicate any hurt or opposing opinion respectfully and without spite.

‎6. When a conflict arises, I will listen to your view and respect you, your thoughts, and your feelings.
‎5. I will always put your needs and desires before my own.

‎4. I will fulfill my role as your wife and will do everything within my power to help meet your needs, choosing to serve you, not merely out of duty but as an act of love.

‎3. I vow to always honor you and submit to the authority and spiritual leadership God has given you as my husband.

‎2. I will always trust Him and believe His truth about you, having resolute faith in His word.

1. First and foremost, I vow to never forsake my faith in God or His plan for our lives.

Having a good marriage isn't hard, but seems so and millions of divorces each year make it look very difficult. Following God is also not hard but seems to be so as so many people give up and turn from God each year. It isn't hard. All you have to do is give up yourself completely and follow God will all of your being. That's all. You die and go away. God lives through you. Get that straight, and first, the definition of a "good marriage" will be defined by God and not you. Secondly, your life and your marriage will please God and therefore will be "good."

I was eating a Doner Kepab & waiting for my bus on this sunny day in downtown Heidelberg, Germany. Amid the scores of German speakers, 2 men walked by talking in plain English. 1 was smiling & saying "the unconditional love of Jesus" as they walked. Unlikely as that senario was, it got me thinking. We want God to love us unconditionally, but do WE love Him unconditionally? Or only if He meets our standards? I have heard it said that most atheists are really just mad at God because they either feel they have not been treated fairly by God or that God has not met their expectations as to how He should govern things.

Check out this cool painting I found in my backyard! My kids spilled several cans of paint in the corner of our backyard last year. When the first storm came, lightening happened to strike the puddle of paint and grass and leaves. After that, over the course of the year, this painting is what evolved. Amazing!

Since last time, Rachel has gone to North Carolina and has married her Thomas. They have their own apartment now and are having a great time stocking it and settling in. They recently had the chance to attend a married retreat and said it was good for them. Rachel is reporting that she's having great fun just getting to know her husband each day.

I've been on leave now for a month and today I'm planning to sign back in. I'll have to shave by beard off and that's the second worst part of the whole deal. :( ;) Really, the saddest part is just having to not be with my children each day. I really feel like the Lord's ultimate best will is for families to work and live and play together. Whatever we do for "increase" ought to be all done together. The world system we live in isn't designed that way and is contrary to God's will. Anyhow, I seek the Lord perhaps daily for His deliverance and am thankful for how much time I DO get with my family while working out of debt and finishing the term of service I'm in.

Our landlords are replacing an outdoor staircase and I believe doing some wall repairs as well. So, we felt like the best option would be to live elsewhere during that time. We didn't have the money to afford to travel or stay in a hotel so we were planning to stay and somehow live around the dust and noise and repairs. Then our missionary friends, the Macy's, who are from the US and live about 10 miles from us in Germany, invited us to live in the vacant apartment downstairs from them in the building they live in and are managers of. We were so excited to have the chance to live a greater measure of community life in the Lord with them and grow in that expression of following Jesus. It's been a real blessing this week and also a challenge for growth. I believe both families are growing and learning together in the Lord. They are very generous, loving, open, down-to-earth, and cool people and it's a rare find to run into people like them.

Micah's been playing lots of guitar now that Rachel has gone and left her favorite one with him and in his care. Jacob and Micah both are doing lots of comic book art work. Hannah is growing so much and maturing in her schooling and elsewhere. She was washing a load of dishes the other day and I was proud of her. She's been a big help to Heather. Nathan is just enjoying playing with his brother in the Lord and it's a pleasure to see them together playing. Eden is such a princess and it's great be with her so much. It's been so fulfilling to be home with the kids. As much as we miss Rachel, it was time for her to go and I can see the growth in everyone as we all step up to fill in the gap. We miss her, but we are not in constant sorrow or mourning as the Lord knew it was time and prepared us. This is how it's supposed to work, I believe.

Oh, Micah has finally gotten a large revelation of what Romans 6 is all about. He came into my room excitedly talking about "I get it, Dad!" and he was grinning ear to ear. We discussed it and he was very confident and articulated things well. He's also been reading some of the Pearl's commentary on the topic and we've been discussing that also.

Heather, Micah, and I have all been reading a book together called "Revolution in World Missions" and it's been fun to read it and discuss it as we go along. A great way to be connected. The book emphasizes several things, but one in particular is something that's been on my heart for awhile. A social gospel isn't THE GOSPEL. It's the cart that the horse pulls but preaching and teaching who Jesus Christ is, inviting others to know and serve Him, and disciple them with a solid Holy Bible and Spirit based foundation is THE calling we all have. Meeting needs is not the objective but will come out of doing the first.

Okay, well, that's enough writing for now but I hope you feel somewhat caught up.